Sunday, October 31, 2004


"everywhere in the west there are subversive minorities who, sheltered by our humanitarianism and our sense of justice, hold the incendiary toarches ready, with nothing to stop the spread of their ides except the critical reason of a single, fairly intelligent, mentally stable stratum of the population. one should not overestimate the thickness of this stratum...

the mass crushes out the insight and reflection that are still possible with the individual, and this necessarily leads to doctrinaire and authoritarian tyranny if ever the consistutional state should succumb in a fit of weakness..."

from the undiscovered self by c. g. jung (1957)

Saturday, October 30, 2004

nother day, nother holler.

took the genz dogs for a walk this morning. beautiful day, beautiful fall colors. and if you don't know what a genz dog is, that's too bad.

spent the afternoon indoors slaving away over hot computer figuring out how to print postcards. out of art. or into.

either way i had a hell of a time getting front and back to match up and downsise. i mean downwize.

that a relatively simple problem took me more time to solve than i expected is no surprise. so does walking from a to b. so does going to a movie.

oddly enough i can still buy groceries as fast as anyone i know.

now for the important stuff: election.

i voted last week.

i'm restricted media-wize (sorry i can't seem to stop) to 3 1/2 over the air channels.

the radio is cool, on AM i can get the left wing socialist pinko extreme liberal station "air america". BBC at night.

what a ballet. reality for what it's worth is being re-orchestrated by "the noise machine". and we're part of it.

what if they had an election - like they used to have bread and circuses in byzantium - and nobody came? or everybody voted with a symbol instead of a sign?

bush, kerry, nader, neocons, liberals, sierra club, sound byte, spin, reality shows; they are all brand names, right?

which are you gonna buy?

Thursday, October 28, 2004

this is a test. i can't post very easy any more. i think it is because this damn thing is way too big. i'm going to redo it some day.

Wednesday, October 27, 2004

rainy day outside, good day to stay put.

projects piling up. tydying up new life book before jeff gets back from india. i am certain he will have a lot of new stuff to be shoehorned in.

something has been missing from my daily routine and i finally figured out what it is: audio recording which i've been away from for a long time. the last couple of days ive reconfigured this and that and started putting old pieces of music together. i lost my midi connection to keyboard for awhile but i'm back in business now. i want to resuscitate qudra 650 which i think will help me with a few audio workarounds.

marx said governments would wither away. that's what must be happening as the electorial process here descends deeper and deeper into the noise abyss. a lot of the nonsense going on seems to hinge on choice of institution - or as some might say, "the man". it's either government or bizz, that's the choice to rule our life. i think we are on the cusp of an as yet non-existant emergant choice. one outside the economic and government spheres. if this happens, the 2 reigning domains will fade away into some ornimental state, like fuedalism into chivelry in the late middle ages.

the newly emergant will no doubt include things like experience, ludic emplyment, a new reverence for human experience and all like that.

or not.

Tuesday, October 26, 2004


why nader is right: he describes the present state of electorial democracy accurately, and does a good job of highlighting the reasons it is not working any more.

why i am voting for kerry: it may give the nation state and the people who live in it time to realize that nader is right.

Monday, October 25, 2004


a flower in hand

to give back to you

who live in the land

where beauty is true.

saturday i shot some fall folige at dr. r's. first time in 4 autumns i managed to do this before it was winter and too late. sunday i decleared a non-day, stayed home and did nothing much. slept a lot.

week before the election, should be a few blips of excitment, but i think the real action will be invisible to us peasants.

surprises? of course? surprises that matter? we'll see.

in the meantime, 2 good pieces about mr. dylan.

Alex Ross: The Rest Is Noise: Emptying the ashtrays

Alex Ross: The Rest Is Noise: The Wanderer

Saturday, October 23, 2004


it's quick, it's loose

but i don't care

it's gotta be around,

maybe in the air

don"t know when i lost it,

it could have been the night

it poured cats and dogs

and i thought i saw some lights

i looked low

and i looked high

couldn't remember

just what was i

loss is part of life

the part that you can feel

but i can't see too good

something is concealed

yesterday is no account

the past is pulled apart

right now i'm doing this

cause i misplaced my heart

the wind it sings

blows through my mind

scatters thoughts

i'll never find

the lost and found department

must have a lot of stuff

but it's lost too

left me feeling pretty rough

don't worry that it's useless

don't fret about what's not

there's plenty more out there somewhere

i know that i forgot.

a song for the rest of us, and i can almost guarantee that it did not exist ten minutes ago. the radio is off, the TV's out the door, no newspapers, not a book that i can read. my mind was ringing, now it sings. lounge music, scrounge music, singing in it's chains. thanks to both dylans for this respite.

Thursday, October 21, 2004

if you can't stand seeing it friday night, read it here now:

Daily Kos :: "Stolen honor" - TRANSCRIPT


a heavy presence

clouds the land

raving priestess


plays end,

lives unravel

if time is real

there's nowhere to travel

hunker down

it's happened before

you could say

don't know what it's for

Wednesday, October 20, 2004

news concerning ferrets, image, and the matrix, not necessarily in that order:

University of Rochester Press Releases

Monday, October 18, 2004

i was emailed this link this morning by tharpa. thanks. it shows, i believe, why this election concerns much more than the candidates and their differing world views.

Stewart on Crossfire

if bush wins, it will mark a point in our culture where human discourse has been replaced by iconic, brand name machinations which the media have fallen into supported by the kind of cash that only multi-nationals have. it could easily be the leading edge of a communication revolution where individual thought ceases to be the source of expression and becomes instead the repository of predetermined knee jerk response.

there may remain here and there small circles of friends who respect the dignity of human existence and attempt to express it, but they will probably only talk late at night in secure locations.

naming something establishes a relationship between the namer and the named. the machinery pushing for the re-election of the junta has just about taken that power from the humans that live in it's world.

i am convinced that the silenced majority feels this taking place and doesn't like it. but without a language other than mediated postures, what can they do?

on the positive side i heard ABC's doctor in residence say on the news broadcast last night that profit may not be the best motive for making and distributing flu vaccine.

profit as the engine that drives our world has displaced every other reason to get something done. big mistake.

on the negative side, the only alternative the doctor could imagine was the government.

new entities with new motivations are slowly taking form. but a bush win could set all this back.

Sunday, October 17, 2004


finished yesterday. i used some 25 year old gouach on this painting and was delighted with what it can do. a quarter century ago when i tried it, i got nowhere. now it's just another tool. either it or i or both have changed.

had an epiphany yesterday afternoon: the light, the color, the air were beautiful. even more meaningful, my apartment seemed just right, everything, all 10,000 of them seemed animated, in a good mood, and already ready as they say.

for all of us, the election floats in the background of the world. worrisome, uneasy, troubled.

my present thoughts are that the folks who vote for bush are the folks who are perfectly - well maybe not perfectly - at ease with the brand name commerce world view. they do not expect, nor want, verbal or written monologues or dialogues. they are comforted by the video icons of the junta.

in advertising, there is something called (i think) "reinforcement". this is an ad placed not so much to convert you to buy the product as to make you feel good that you chose the product in the past. the cola drinks excel at this technique.

the junta is 100% using this mode now that nothing else has seemed to work for them. it does not matter whether bush contradicts himself, lies, or makes any sense. the public does not expect this in brand name publicity: just the appearance of the branded icon is enough.

the marketing people of the new world disorder will tell you that this works.

if McBush is elected - for the first time i might add - it will mark the beginning of a world view that deals only in brand name symbols. the losers will be thinkers (eggheads), the new young voters (gen whatever), and other pockets of the population who see thru the brand name miasma.

there is to be a protest at WLOS, local TV station owned by sinclair who are ordering it's possession, and all of the other many TV stations it owns, to show anti-kerry production next friday as "news". because of the time and location this should be an interesting exercise.

Saturday, October 16, 2004


i'm working on the picture above. some old photos were found in chapel hill and this is one of them. the original is really really beat up. sally and eric, basalt colorado, 69-70?

this morning i got up at 5 and drove to get a drive-by, oops i mean drive through clinic. it was already gridlocking when i got there, but i was out in three hours. i think it was good practice for a possible future, i mean right now.

visited john r., fall already well started in those neck of the woods.

threw old mattress and boxsprings out and installed new twin. plan is to put elevated plywood under it.

late this afternoon, back home, the light and air were crystal clear, everything seemed like it was.

Friday, October 15, 2004


took me awhile to sloooowly bounce back from recent trip. i think i'm still bouncing.

about the election campaign which i've mostly avoided talking about because i'm soooo confused. not about who we all need to vote for, but about the cultural landscape materializing in front of us.

the junta that kidnapped the republican party are using a streamlined and highly tweaked version of the technique they have used - mostly successfully - since reagon. ie dems are liberal, tax and spend, probably demonstrated against the vietnam war and still can't park a bicycle straight.

but it strikes me that this mode has evolved into something very disturbing. it is a sort of brand consciousness mode, has more in common with advertising cereal on tv than what we used to call politics.

take "total", the cereal that for over 20 years has competed successfully with variations on one message: it has 100% of the daily vitamins you need. what this means is that if you only ate one meal a day that was a bowl of this cereal you would starve, but nonetheless have a full day's worth of vitamins.

bush and his people have adapted this method of selling. everything they say is short and familiar. slogans, bumper sticker stuff.

and like tv ads, truth or falsity does not matter. we have been conditioned to watch ads with no regard to truth. they are simply icons repeated endlessly.

but they work. they sell stuff.

so the meaningless slogans, "you can run but not hide", "tax and spend liberal" etc. might actually win the election. the democrats are a step behind, attempting to discuss issues.

if kerry loses, a lot of bad things will ensue. one of them will be future elections that are a parody, much like the elections in some third world countries where icons are marked on the ballot. coca cola or pepsi?

Tuesday, October 12, 2004


woke up

got out of bed

dragged a comb

across my head

took a look

blinked my eyes

scratched my feet

they weren't my size


today's illustration i drew at my son eli and wife melissa's house on the evening i arrived in chapel hill - fri.

extremely nice visit with my father and sister, children and grandchildren. everyone doing well, better and better. what a pleasure to visit with them all. definitely was a challenge to my stamina, but i can't think of more pleasant way to spend it.

everyone's head was screwed on differently but right. now that that is settled i'm going to bed.

tomorrow i'll be trying to score flu vaccine. stand in front of alley and mutter " any flu vaccine?" to the passers-by. good practice for the new millennium. maybe i can trade a kidney for some.

i understand the corporations don't like to manufacture this vaccine because there is no money in it. so the entire situation makes sense and is right. the profit motive is the prime-time injunction. what a relief.

Sunday, October 10, 2004

sunday morning. my dad and sister are visiting in chapel hill, 3 of my children and 2 grandchildren - my dad's great-grand children.

dad says good morning. beautiful weather. we are heading for the park to see sally's bench.

nice day to play. reishi mushrooms are where it's at.

Thursday, October 7, 2004


Wednesday, October 6, 2004


woke up this morning

got out of my head

wiggled my toes

and got out of bed

stumbled to the coffee pot

circled for a bit

mixed up the medicine

the light bulb was lit

remembered a dream

which i promptly forgot

later i'll eat

or maybe not

right now i'm sitting

looking at my talk

words here & there

key in the lock

the door might be open

to one more day

i think i'll walk out

and check out the play

Tuesday, October 5, 2004

in 1955 i was living with my parents and younger sister in alexandria va. we had moved from 2 years in tainan taiwan. i got a clock radio for christmas. i used it at night turned low to fall asleep by. i tried different stations. i don't even remember if there was FM.

one station really grabbed me. i often think about it because there was no platform in my culture to expose me to WOOK in washington dc.

what was it in the air that threw me right into this music at the age of 13 - 14 years old.

bb king, big joe turner, muddy waters, harpo slim. that blues thing that was a giant magnetic force in the culture. it took over the world.

there was a disk jockey on in the evening named lord flauntleroy bandy. he was from jamaca. he only spoke in rhyme.

so that's what i'm going to try awhile on this ongoing "thing"

like crossin the street with your hat in the ring.

expected return most any hour

rpms without any power.

Monday, October 4, 2004


pleasant sunday, well paced. walk in the morning thru the mist and fog. talked later in the day to an acquaintance who said she was not going out all day for a number of reasons, one being the cold nasty weather. it's that time of the year when i wonder around in shorts and t shirts surrounded by coats and sweaters. my addled metabolism does better in the cold.

skipped friends meeting to clean and organize for trip later in week. pretty much finished first run of miniature water color mountain landscapes, i'll live with them for awhile, see what i've got, and start putting them on note cards for the gods of commerce.

was headed for Baba meeting at 4 but got a call from old friend doug who is in town so spent some time visiting him and a few friends. nice time out.

haven't been to see the Baba folks in awhile and will touch bases with them one of these sunday afternoons coming up.

doc appt at ten this morning. will change oil and radiator fluid after to prepare for trip to chapel hill. now for the important stuff:

alone at nite i pace the walls

the silence of the crickets loud

the first full moon of autumn

drifts in and out of clouds.

my dreams are distant, far away

or maybe they're right here.

cold air streams thru the windows

my mind is empty, clear

somewhere limbic rivers dance

in shaded groves of thought

wounded warriors sit around

only glad they fought.

the images are never done

there is no end to flow

i feel the mystery's edge,

the place where thoughts won't go.

soon enough

slow mornings glow

will open up the crowded space

where light's surprise will show.

Sunday, October 3, 2004


i've been working with a set of 4 x 6 watercolors, that is reducing and otherwise prepping them into 4 x 6 200 dpi files. object is to turn out sets of notecards with envelopes etc. to place in local shops. above is the last one, now i can move onto penultimate step. (there is no ultimate step, y'know.)

what to say about today?

a surprise or two along the way.

took a walk up thru the mist;

realized i missed the kiss

the wind blew so far away.

but the mountaintop says that's OK,

the perfect moment must contain

muddy boot tracks along the lane,

otherwise why be here,

so far away and way too near.

Saturday, October 2, 2004


i replaced the picture that was above with the one that is above. the former was my try at comment on the debate and it didn't work. the present pix is straight out of my head 4:30 this morning. i'm going to stay away from visual editorials in the future.

watched the debate w/ a few cutaways and thought maybe kerry had a slight edge. rewatched it on a split screen and it was kerry by a landslide. the reaction shots of both participants made all the difference, the sound could just as well have been off, so the split screen version was far more devestating for bush. if i had it to do over i would have listened to mr. dylan for the audio portion.

then stuck around for the instant spin and was relieved that kerry was declared the winner. took about one hour.

last nite spent a classic evening in asheville, one hour with the ladies in black, dinner, drumming circle till ten.

i could feel the special quality of aville here and now. heard 6 different people say they'd moved here in the last 2 weeks. it's happening folks. wonder what it will be like as time does it's thing.